Point Zero

The points in green are optimal satisfaction with the six areas in the circle. The gold is where I ranked myself on those areas. Work is great, I love it. I know I made the right decision. Friends are alright, things could improve, but I'm working on it. Physically and spiritually, I'm in the same place I have been for years. I'm not ready to tackle that yet. Fun is low and adventure is low. 

These are two areas I want to look towards improving on a daily basis. I try to have fun everyday, doing things that I enjoy and helping others to do the same. Adventure doesn't come by as often as I would like it. If I had my way, I would set out for an adventure every weekend. Small things, hikes, time out of the city, exploring the city more, doing something new. I crave adventure and need to take the time and make it happen. 

Trying new things is difficult. Fear creeps in and I like to retreat, back to the comfortable, back to where I know I will succeed. But that's not adventurous. I need to be less fearful. Lets embrace adventure!

Who, me?

Twenty five things that represent success and adulthood to me:

1. A job that pays enough for me to live comfortably
2. A feeling of joy
3. Learning to be in a relationship
4. Not being afraid of life
5. Being outdoors more
6. Drinking less
7. Filling the days with activities
8. Learning to cook
9. Caring for others without neglecting myself
10. Keeping promises
11. Having hope for the future
12. Recognizing when I am losing my way
13. Having hobbies
14. Not being afraid to spend time alone
15. Preparing a meal for my friends/family at the holidays
16. Travelling
17. Having a passport (and using it!)
18. Consistently doing yoga
19. Learning to eat vegetables
20. Joining a yoga studio
21. Living alone (or with a partner, no roommate.)
22. Getting married
23. Stating that I want to get married without cringing
24. Being able to effectively manage my emotions
25. Being happy

I thought making this list would be difficult. But as it turns out, I have a clear picture in my head of who I would like to be as an adult. Technically, I guess adulthood has started for me. I am living on my own, I have a career that I love, and I have a dog that I manage to keep alive (and healthy!). Unfortunately, I don't do yoga as much as I would like, I eat skittles and candy for dinner, I can't cook, and the idea of marriage makes me want to run screaming and hide under the covers.

I know that being an adult doesn't mean that I have to give up being playful and enjoying myself, it just means that I will take more responsibility. I will stop drinking excessively, I will not take drugs, I will not romanticize my drug use and I will attempt to sustain my lifestyle on my current income, without constantly wishing for more.

So, how do I do this? I have no clue.

I guess I should start by looking at what I am doing. Writing about it, recognizing the behaviors that I would like to change and take the painful steps to make that change.

Step 1: ...